Audrey Jolly Therapy

Couples - Fear and Longing

Posted Feb 18th, 2014 in Mental Health

Couples - Fear and Longing

Couples-Communication-Love or


Communication problem between couples on one level but the verbal communication is always fueled by the lower levels driving the intellectual interaction. At he level of attachment These people become very important to us.  We give them a huge responsibility to hold our emotional needs for us making us feel happy, safe, loved, keeping us from ourselves.  We go powerless give away all our own consciousness to the other. We hide parts of ourselves out of fear of displeasing or angering or rejection.   The ultimate fear being left, abandoned, rejected, no longer loved by them , taken care of having them there for us protecting us can we trust them are they there for us do they love us am I good enough, attractive enough, Am I enough.?

Fear in Relationship

Couples fears I most often see are can I trust the other person? Are you there for me? Do you love me? Am I safe with you? Am I attractive to you? Will you stay with me?

Darling, I’m here for you.  Darling, I know you are here for me.  Darling I know that you are suffering.  Just know that I am here for you.  Darling, I’m suffering and lost right now.  I’m doing the best I can and I know that you are here for me.

When you love someone, the best thing you can offer is your presence.  How can you love if you are not there?

Thich Naht Hanh


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